Counselling went well this week.  We talked about a lot though...

One big thing for me was that at the weekend I told myself about the DID, and now I'm trying to persuade one of my littles that she was telling the truth when she accepted it and understood.

At counselling, there was another little that came out, that had a much deeper voice.  I say little, but it seemed older than the others.  It also was very negative. It didn't like Oya talking about 'HIM' and saying bad things about him.  It started speaking over her, which we don't normally do.  She asked who it was that had been talking, but we had no idea.

We're going to start to look at my feelings for him, and how to accept the truth of what he was, and how manipulative he was, and that what he did was wrong, but it's going to be hard as that seems to be the centre of everything to do with how I've coped up till now, but I've come to the realisation that nothing can change unless I change my view of him.